Not much to say from these which is a
concern considering the limited amount of appointments i have for
this therapy. The first one is as you might expect is an introduction
and a general overview of what you are going through, the second
appointment though was pretty a waste of fucking time.
My appointment time was 12:30, i got to
the bus stop at 11:25, expecting a bus to turn up at or around
11:30...it did not show up until 12:03, now as the journey into the
city centre can take upto 20-30 minutes and on top of that its a 20
minute walk from the centre to where this therapy place is, so thanks
to Trent Barton i was going to be late.
I called the place to say i was running
late, the receptionist informed me that if i was more than 15 minutes
late the therapist may not see me. So the challenge is on, i gotta
get to this place by 12:45 at the latest, lets face it i don't have
enough of a challenge as it is, dealing with the anxiety of wondering
whats going to happen in the therapy session in addition to going
right past Kelly's place on the way.
Finally the bus gets me into the centre
at 12:30...12:30, ridiculous. So after much forced speed marching and
jogging (with inflamed lungs making breathing extremely difficult, my
lower legs went numb and my hamstrings felt as though they were going
to snap) i made to this place by 12:44. The therapist comes in and
says there is no point doing the appointment as there won't be enough
time for him to cover everything he wants to, now if i wasn't so busy
trying to get my breathing and heart rate under control i'd said 'you
got be fucking kidding me, i've just about killed myself getting
here'.
In the end he saw me for a
few minutes I think out of appreciation for the fact I had rushed to
get to there asap, after asking a few times if i wanted a drink of
water he told me the therapy would be focused on the trauma of me
being mugged (and a few attempted muggings) years ago, he reckons its
these that are the root cause of the night terrors. He also gave this
thing to look up over the internet 'Eye Movement Desensitisation
Reprocessing' (EMDR) which I’ll go into in a bit.
That was basically it, I
wasn't happy I rushed to get there for all of a few minutes, the next
appointment is in another two weeks, I walked back, it was pissing it
down with rain and I wonder why I bother at times.
Now for this EMDR, copied
from Wiki;
Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR)
is a psychotherapy developed by Francine
Shapiro, which emphasizes disturbing memories as the cause of
psychopathology [1][2]
and alleviates the symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
EMDR is used for individuals who have experienced severe trauma which
remains unresolved.[3]
According to Shapiro, when a traumatic or distressing experience
occurs, it may overwhelm normal cognitive and neurological coping
mechanisms. The memory and associated stimuli are inadequately
processed, and stored in an isolated memory network.[4]
The goal of EMDR therapy is to process these distressing memories,
reducing their lingering effects and allowing clients to develop more
adaptive coping mechanisms. This is done by having clients recall
traumas while following the therapist's hand movement.[5]
The use of EMDR was originally developed to treat adults suffering
from PTSD, however, it is also used to treat children.[6]
Just to be clear, the
therapist is not saying I have PTSD (well he said I don't have 'full
blown PTSD' whatever that means), I most certainly do not. I hadn't
heard of this before so I learned about something new, I imagine the
therapist will want to try this treatment and I have have no issue
with doing so, some studies have shown some positive results and has
the added benefit with having no negative side effects.
Bearing in mind its a CBT
therapist I am seeing its interesting to see he's using a treatment
from the psychotherapy side of things. Not overly keen on accessing
the disturbing memories I got in here but if it helps to lessen the
impact of these night terrors then its got be done.
30th May 2013
the journey continues.
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